Thursday, March 15, 2007

"...if that makes a difference"

It was my friend's thirtieth birthday party and i had decided to get really dressed up.
I wore this fabulous dress that i got in Chinatown in Soho ages ago. It's a full length dark green satin Cheongsam with a thigh high split at each side and a peacock embroidered in red and white thread on the front. It's tail feathers are not on display but curve down the skirt of the dress behind the bird. I wore red heels and far more make-up than i normally do. I was looking hot.
First of all he asked one of my friends, "who's the fox in the green dress?
Now i've met this guy lots of times before over the years, so i wasn't impressed that he had only just noticed me after all that time. Then he came and sat next to me and said, "Can just say that you look absolutely gorgeous. You're so burlesque."
Never been called that before; but it was unmistakably a compliment.
But he didn't overdo it, which is always a point-scorer in my book, he just let me get on with my night.
At the end of the night the birthday girl thanked him for DJing. Within my earshot he said, "No problem, i'll DJ for you any time, as long as she's there," and pointed in my direction.
Now this particular friend has a way of convincing me to do things in my love-life that i would not normally do. (I don't know why she has that effect on me- i could give you other examples but perhaps another time.) A few days later she's telling me that i should phone him and go for a drink with him. She gives me the low-down on his personal history and it all seems fine. I argue and say that i don't ask other people, they ask me. She gives me his number and i convince myself i should do it because i never do things like this, and everybody else does it and thinks nothing of it, and that's possibly why i'm the only single person i know.
So, i text him and ask him if he wants to go out....
The next day i get a reply which says that, sure we can go for a drink, but he's been seeing someone since the start of the year (NB. it was February) if that makes a difference.

How utterly perfect a message is that? The ultimate in ambiguous textual intercourse.

So, could be read as "we can go for a drink if you want to be friends" or equally "we can go for a drink if you are happy to proceed knowing that i have a girlfriend".

Am i being too obvious by spelling this out?


cathy said...

This is what Bridget Jones' friends would call fuckwittage.

Northern Creative said...

sounds complicated. Keep away. Great post though. The dress sounds fabulous. more about your love life please!

fish said...

go for that drink...a plutonic listener...file those hesitations for latter...encourage doubt...exploit weaknesses...take advantage...walk away. Job done.

Nina Chadwick said...

Okay, next time i'm going to ask you guys BEFORE anything happens rather than after.