Sunday, April 22, 2012

Hindsight

When we got back to work, I could tell that he felt he had to 'make up' for falling asleep on me. 
The flirting was stepped up a notch.  He crossed the boundary that was our two desks width and he came and sat on the chair next to mine.  He sat with his arms outsretched across the radiator.
"You should take me out for a drink sometime......."
And that's how it starts isn't it? 
I know this now.  That's how it starts, with the casual assertion that 'you should do something for me', when really 'no, you should take me out for a drink'.
Nonetheless, I went.
On the evening we had arranged, I felt like shit.  I had one of those colds with blocked sinuses that make you feel like you're having an uncomfortable out of body experience.  After a day at work, the last thing I wanted to do was drink. I explained as soon as we met that I would just be having one glass of wine.  He said he was glad I hadn't canceled because he would have been really upset if I had.
I don't remember what we talked about.
At the end of the evening I went home (after all it was a school day).
He told me the next day, that he'd given someone a call and gone on to a club.
In hindsight, it all seems so disturbingly obvious.

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